Food jokes
Why don't vegetarians moan during sex?
Because they don't want to admit that meat makes them happy.
What's the hardest part about eating vegetables?
Eating the wheelchair.
What do you call terrible milk?
Udder Bullshit.
Q: What is the hardest part of a cabbage?
A: Wheelchair.
Why can Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
1. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
2. What is fast, loud, and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed!
4. What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield!
5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
Where does a Muslim like to go and eat?
Allah's snackbar!
Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Man, it's hot in here!"
The other muffin says, "OH MY GOSH A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!"
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards...
The steaks were pretty high.
What did the shark say after he ate the clownfish?
"This taste a little funny."
What a skeleton baked for the other skeleton.
A pa_pıe_rus.
A boy asked his dad: "Why didn’t you make love with my mom, Daddy?"
Dad: "Because I’m gay."
*Son started making out with his daddy and sucking his daddy’s big peepee.*
Son: "W- Wait a minute. So how did I exist if you didn’t make love with my mom if you’re not straight?"
Dad: "Because you are not real, and I didn’t even have a wife."
The son woke up from his horrible nightmare, and he looked so scared. He did leave his bed to check out his dad, but he didn’t find his dad, until his dad entered the house, and he said to his son: "Why did you look so worried? I’m just bringing some food for breakfast."
Son: "Well, but why are your hands full of cum ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ?"
Dad: "Because I did it with you last night. Did you forget?"
Son: "But it was a nightmare..."
*Dad turns into a monster*
Dad: "I’m your nightmare!"
The son woke up, and he seemed too scared, and he found himself beside his dad torturing him after he discovered he’s gay.
The son with himself: "Wake up, b*tch, wake up, b*tch!!!!!!"
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
What is the difference between a gay man and a fridge? A fridge doesn't moan when you put meat in it.
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
Why does the ice cream have so many friends?
Because he’s cool.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
So, I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said, "Yes ma'am." She said, "Oh honey, you don't have to call me ma'am, I'm not that old." I said, "Okay, thanks bitch."
What cookies did the orphans never try?
Home made cookies!
So a cupcake walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says to himself, "Damn, this is some good shit."
What did 50 do when he was hungry?
58.