Next time I'm at a restaurant, and they ask what I want to drink, I'm going to say bleach.
A cocksucker is still a cocksucker if a cocksucker only sucks for moral, religious, or health reasons, and a vegetarian who doesn't eat meat for moral, religious, or health reasons can still be a cocksucker, so how can a cocksucker be a vegetarian for moral, religious, or health reasons?
What is the difference between a feminist and a vegetarian? A vegetarian doesn't eat meat for moral, religious, or health reasons. However, a feminist doesn't act like a bitch for moral, religious, or health reasons.
It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.
From the makers of Mangeone...
I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.
My doctor said I could have up to 20 units a week. But now I've eaten half of my kitchen.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
What did the frog order? A diet croak!
What do Greek people never want to have on their food? Grease
English: It's the story of two potatoes, one gets mashed and the other screams “Oh mash!”
French: C’est l’histoire de deux pommes de terre.Une d’elles se fait écraser et l’autre s’écrie “Oh purée !”
What’s a homeless persons favourite food
why do you let your dads sleep so they dont get grumpy and eat your dinner
a chicken is dellisis
I don't like marriage, it's just like soup, as soon as your done spooning it all cools off
I didn’t eat breakfast because I’m starving myself
When you ask your friend if he thinks lunch is good but he says that he doesn't taste anything
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
Q. What is the titanic favorite food A. Ice Burger
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta-way
what's a vampires favourite fruit? a neck-tarine
