You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.
I would tell you a joke about meat, but the stakes are too high.
Today I learned that on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.
Being an orphan isn't all bad. On the bright side, all your snacks are family-sized.
ur mom loves to eat logs lmao
Q: What's 1+1? 2+2? 4+4? 8+8? Name a vegetable.
A: Carrot 🥕
Why are kids so skinny?
Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.
Your mum eats cabbage.
whats an emos favorite food
shot gun ammo
What flour do orphans use?
Self-raising flour.
I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.
Why can’t blind people eat fish? Because it’s sea food.
What do you call a legless cow?
Handicapped and stupid and monke and food.
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
What do eggs use in war? Eggk47s get my yolk this is really cracking me up!
They’d probably get shellshocked, wasn’t it all eggcellent? Ok, Ok, I’m headed for the egg-it.
Why did the new egg fell so good? It just got laid.
You're as tall as a giraffe.
Well, that's why you look like a baked bean!
If you're waiting for a waiter at a restaurant, aren't you the waiter?
Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.
These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
