Following jokes
How do you disappoint people in Africa?
Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.
But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.
Run, or something will come to you, and you will be afraid to tell it to stop following you.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
Mother: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you follow?
Me: Leads a marching parade off the Golden Gate Bridge.
Anyone remember the following?
Please follow me at Mary.cristal03 on TikTok.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Really, there is an answer, and he never made it across, so...
Why does the paper follow up with wine because it was junk? Do wrong, so wrong that you don’t even exist because nobody even eats it. Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Haha ha ha! Haha ha haha ha ha! Ha hah hah hah ha!
Lenin was on his deathbed, with Stalin sitting by his side.
Lenin says: "What are you going to do after I die? They might not follow you."
Stalin responds: "Then they'll follow you."
Why did Blitzkrieg work so well in France?
Because lightning always follows the path of least resistance.
Stephen Hawking said he wants other physicists to follow in his footsteps.
Why was Sonic fast?
To be rolling around at the speed of sound, got places to go, gotta follow my lead.
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always follow the beat.
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always follow the street signs.
How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?
The weird moaning sounds when you try to slide in the back door.
Followed by slipping in Kentucky (KY) Jelly.
Followed by landing in deep shit.
Followed by being totally covered in sea men.
Symptoms of Schizophrenia.
The symptoms of this condition are fairly easy to recognize because they stand out so distinctly from a person’s usual behavior. In order for a diagnosis to be made, the person must suffer from two or more of the following for at least one month:
Delusions
Hallucinations
Three girls were lined up for execution. The black-haired one, being the smart one, turned around and yelled, "Tornado!"
Everyone panicked, and she escaped. The red-headed one, following her example, shouted as the executioners got back, "Hurricane!"
The red-headed friend escaped too. Now, it was the blonde's turn. Following both her friends, she turned to the executioners and yelled:
"Fire!"
Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:
Sum Ting Wong.
Wei Toh Low.
Ho Lee Fuk.
Ban Din Ouch.
Why is Sally on TikTok?
Because she wants followers, so follow carcar1431 and xox.meg.xox1.
A woman once didn't return home for the night, and the next morning when she arrived home, her husband started questioning her about where she had been. She lied, saying she slept at one of her friends' houses.
The man proceeded to call all her friends, all of whom denied her sleeping at their places the previous night.
Meanwhile, somewhere else, a man didn't return home to his wife for the night either. The following morning, his wife started questioning him, and he lied, saying he slept at a friend's house. She proceeded to call all his friends. All of them said that he indeed slept at their places the previous night, and one of them even insisted that he's still there, but he's using the bathroom and he can't talk right now!
LEZZZZZZ GOOOOO! 69 FOLLOWERS!