Firearm jokes

What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?

"That is bull crap!"

What did the father bullet say to the baby bullet when he killed a bull by hitting it in the eye: "Bull's eye!"

Random guy: "Go suck a D*ck!"

Me: Nah, I'd rather suck a 9mm.

Shoot.

I remember my uncle's last words:

"I don't think we're going shooting today."

Orphan: Shooting gun at shooting range, "I'm out of bullets, got a magazine?"

Guy: That's probably because you're single.

I got a lot running through my head right now. I wish at least one was a 12-gauge round.

In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.

And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"

There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.

What's the difference between a bear with a gun and an American man with a gun?

The bear has common sense not to fire it.

What does a blondie and a shotgun have in common?

Give them a cock and they're ready to blow.

I went to the shooting range the other day. After a while, I realized I was the only one there. So, I decided to go home and saw on the news that there was a mass school shooting and there were reporters on the scene. Man, I knew I should have stayed around a little longer.

I remember my grandfather's last words: "Is that loaded?"

How do you paint a wall red?

You shoot a baby with a .50 cal.

Your dick is like a shotgun, one cock and you're ready to fire.

What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.

Me and my friend were hunting ducks. He had a 12 gauge shotgun, and he looked over and I had a .50 caliber machine gun. He said, "You're crazy!" I responded, "Quackers."

Why does Kurt Cobain hate his brother?

Because he's always calling shotgun.

I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?

Kurt Cobain's microphone.

How did Sally die?

She got shot.