Fire jokes
I don't call it arson. I call it warming up.
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
Three girls were lined up for execution. The black-haired one, being the smart one, turned around and yelled, "Tornado!"
Everyone panicked, and she escaped. The red-headed one, following her example, shouted as the executioners got back, "Hurricane!"
The red-headed friend escaped too. Now, it was the blonde's turn. Following both her friends, she turned to the executioners and yelled:
"Fire!"
You call it a burning orphanage. I call it FNAF lore.
After an explosion at a French cheese factory... all that was left was De Brie.
Me always :
Are you the Lusitania 'cause I wanna fire a torpedo into you?
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant.
So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!
Why did the fire not burn the kid? Because it had no lips.
I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.
The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.
What happened when the fire used Tinder?
He luckily got a lot of matches.
Last night I burned down an orphanage.
There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
"FUCK FUCK FUCK MY CLOTHES CAUGHT THE FLAME OH MY GOD IT BURNS SO MUCH!"
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Falco: Dreaming of a day when I don’t hear people say I’m a knockoff Fox, knockoff Fox.
Fox: Dreaming of a day when you die in a fire and I get all your aerial skills.
Falco: Wat…
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
Build your ex a fire, and they're warm for a day.
Set your ex on fire and hide the smile/evidence.
How did the bullet lose its job? It got fired!
Why shouldn't you make fun of burn victims?
Because they've already been roasted!