Film jokes
Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.
"Bippity Bobbity Boo, Boo Radley is coming for you!"
Watched a really cool cartoon about rabbits with Down syndrome yesterday. You should try watching it on catch up... "Watership Down."
What do you call three people in a dark room? A porno.
Bra eat E.T.?
Spaceballs: The Joke.
Spaceballs: The Comment.
Stormtrooper: Hey Palpatine! Luke is Vader's son.
Palpatine: Knew it.
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
How many shades of gray does it take to make a dirty movie?
50.
They told me I could never be an actor.
No one suspected me when they went missing the next day.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wakanda? Wakanda who? WAKANDA ENDING IS THIS?
If life was like Pacific Rim, I'd say your mom's pussy was a category 5.
Q: What do you call a religious Wookie?
A: Jewbacca.
What was the movie about the dog called?
The woof of Wall Street.
Q: What is the best Disney character?
A: Toe Mater.
I don't understand why in horror movies they make digging a grave look so easy. It usually takes me days.
New horror movie idea.
The main character loves anime. The killer yells "Omae wa mou shindeiru." The main character instinctively yells back "NANI???" and is killed.
Chuck Norris: "Chuck Norris doesn't fight, he just allows you to lose."
Me: "How come did you lose Return of the Dragon?"