Fat jokes
Your mum is so fat, when I was driving I had to swerve to avoid [her]. By the time I had finished, I had ran out of gas.
Why did the Indian man eat a cow? Because he wanted to be fat.
These are all of my terrible jokes.
Two antennas met on a roof, they fell in love and got married. The ceremony was alright, but the reception was amazing.
A jumper cable walks into a bar and the bartender said, "I'll serve you but don't start anything."
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says, "Does this taste funny to you? I'm joking of course!"
Dejamoo: the feeling that you've heard this bull before.
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident and said to the doctor "I can't feel my legs." The doctor said, "I know, I amputated your arms!"
I went to seafood disco last week, I pulled a muscle.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall, one says, "Dam!"
A mystic dwarf escapes from a jail, the call went out for a "small medium at large."
A man walks into a bar with solid tar under his arm, he says, "A beer please, and one for the road."
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The p is silent.
Yo mama so fat that she should be worried, diabetes is a serious problem.
What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, duh.
A priest, a rabbi, and a cleric walk into a bar. The cleric, due to his religious constructions, does not drink alcohol. The others do the same, they have a pleasant fun and nothing bad happens.
What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.
I remember the last words my grandad said before he kicked the bucket, "How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
A man walks into a bar, his alcohol independence is pulling this family apart.
I like my coffee like my women, on sometimes with a penis.
A man is working at a bar, a money comes in and orders a banana martini. The man wakes up and tells his story to his wife, he is ignored and he turns around sobbing. His marriage is falling apart.
Why didn't Jesus play hockey? Soccer and baseball are more popular in Mexico.
What's green and has wheels? Grass, the wheels were a lie.
What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have wheels except the duck.
Why couldn't the dinosaur break the wall? I don't know. I'm asking you.
Why did the old woman put rainbow roller skates on her walker? She has dementia.
There are an owl and a squirrel watching a farmer go by, they owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing. It's an owl it can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.
Yo momma so fat, whenever she goes to the beach, the tide comes in!
Your mum's so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.
Yo mama is so fat that she's bigger than the cinematic Marvel Universe.
Fat.
Your mom is so fat when you printed the picture, it would not stop printing! 😂🤣
Why don't you see any more fat Chinese men?
Because the last Chinese man was in WW2.
Why do fat people like food?
The more the merrier.
Yo mama so poop and peepee and sucks on dick.
Your mama so fat that’s why Hulk gets big.
You're so fat that you cause your heart to have panic attacks.
You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.
You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
Are you with Alex?
Fucking retarded. Go dig a home die, people!
Your mama so fat, she filled up Minecraft's block limit! lol XD
Your mamma is so fat that even a North Korean missile would have competition.
My wife is so fat! When she goes swimming, she leaves a ring around the lake.
Yo mama is so fat, when she nocliped into the backrooms, she was in level 0 and level 999 at the same time.