Fat jokes

Yo mama so fat that every time she takes a swim, the Arctic sinks by a mile!

Yo momma so fat, she farts out volcanoes.

I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.

You are so fat that when you go out to check your letterbox, it measures 8 on the Richter scale.

Enemy: You know, I saw you walking down the street, and at first glance, I thought you were a fat and ugly bitch.

Me: Strange... Who puts a mirror in the middle of the street?

Yo mama so fat, when she takes an elevator, it ALWAYS goes down!

Yo mama is so fat that every step she takes in the ocean creates a tsunami!

Your momma so fat, when she asked for a water bed, she got a concrete bed.

How many fat people are in my house?

20, counting the kids in the basement.

Yo mama so fat when she wanted to get wet, she used the highway as a slippin' slide!

I had bullies behind me on the street, but they were too fat and slow, so they got ran over by a truck that represents fat and slow.

Yo mama's so fat, a man has to bring climbing equipment to kiss her on the cheek.

Your momma's so fat, when she asked for a water bed, they put a blanket over the ocean.

Yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man, her bowels fell out.

Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!

Yo mama so fat when The Rock hit her with a Rock Bottom, her big fat ass belly let all the pizza explode out of her belly!

When you went to McDonald's and sat down, you were so fat, they said, "TBC."

What did the butt say to the other butt? "I got big fat apples for butt checks!"

What's the difference between a square peg in a round hole and a kilo of lard?

One's a good lot of fat; the other's a fat lot of good.

I like my women thick, so if they aren't over 375 pounds, they're not stepping into my room.