Fat jokes
Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.
When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.
You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."
Your momma is so fat, when she got in the Pacific, she became the Pacific Ocean.
Your mama's so ugly, she got everything for free.
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
Yo momma so fat, she farts out volcanoes.
Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"
Your momma's so fat, she farted in bed and blew the covers off.
Yo mama so fat that every time she takes a swim, the Arctic sinks by a mile!
You are so fat that when you go out to check your letterbox, it measures 8 on the Richter scale.
Enemy: You know, I saw you walking down the street, and at first glance, I thought you were a fat and ugly bitch.
Me: Strange... Who puts a mirror in the middle of the street?
Yo mama so fat, she called Dr. Seuss and he couldn’t even rhyme back.
Me: Hey, do you live in the ocean?
Random guy: Why?
Me: Because you look like a whale.
On my Tinder profile, I said, "I prefer quality over quantity." I just thought it sounded nicer than saying "no fat birds."
"Hey, kid, why are you so fat?"
"Why did you insult him? That's not nice."
"It won't matter, he's deaf."
Mase looks like a fat gay dude.
Yo mama so fat, when she was just there, she made the whole earth go back to the ice age!
Ur mom is so fat that when she came to the front door, she was already at the back door.
My fat friend went to the doctor because he wanted to know his blood type. After performing some tests, the doctor said, "Well, the test results have shown that your blood type is ragu."
I was driving a car and a fat person was crossing the street. When I swerved my car to miss her, I ran out of gas.