Fast jokes
What do you call Hitler speeding?
The Fast and the Fuherous.
A paradigm are so bad, go away from fast and fast and faster than a rabbit. Once upon a time there was a rabbit who teased a tortoise. The tortoise challenged the rabbit to a race. The race began and the rabbit ran fast as the tortoise walked slow. The rabbit thought the tortoise could not come here so slow, so he decided to take a nap. As he took a nap, the tortoise walked past through him and soon the rabbit woke. He ran as fast as he could, but when he came to the end, the rabbit saw the tortoise and then the rabbit never teased the tortoise again.
Why did the cheetah get sad?
'Cause it didn't have any balls to suck.
Did you know victims of 9/11 are fast readers?
They went down 100 stories in 4 seconds.
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
The 911 people really didn't scramble fast enough, so they got folded like an omelet.
People are like tequila glasses,
you gotta shoot them down fast.
What is Beyonce's favorite fast food chain?
dairy QUEEEEEEENNNN!
Wanna hear the car joke?
Nah, it's too fast for you.
What is a gay person's favorite fast food place?
Jack(off) in the Box.
Superman was flying one day when he saw Wonder Woman laying by the pool completely naked. He thought, "I can fuck her so fast she wouldn't even know what happened." So he then flew down to the pool and did fuck her.
Wonder Woman stood up and said, "What was that?" The Invisible Man said, "I don't know, but my asshole stinks!"
Why do dwarfs hate fast food restaurants? Cause most of them have medium and large.
There was this man, and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up, she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale.
Who are the fastest readers in the world? New Yorkers. They went through 110 stories in under 10 seconds.
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
The people in 9/11 were the fastest readers. They went through 10 stories in 10 seconds.
Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek?
Because he's always spotted.
Lewandowski is so fast because whoever would think of adding an engine to him is a genius!
Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.
My depression: hey, what's up!
Me: go away.
My depression: well how rude.
Me: 🙄.
My depression: remember that one time......
Me: no, don't even.
My depression: that we.....
Me: nope.
My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.
Me: 😳😶😟.
My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in seconds.