Fast Food jokes
Did you hear about the new P. Diddy meal in McDonald's? It's a 56-year-old meat inside a 12-year-old bun.
What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?
They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.
Conservatives when they hear about “liberal arts:” 👊😡
Liberals when they find out about forest conservation: 😩👐
Progressives when they see a reaction video: 🤬
Reactionaries when a Progressive ad comes on (Flo is annoying): 😱
Anticoms realizing they are a part of a “community:” *seizure*
Anticaps when they have to Capitalize Their Words: 😤
Anti-monarchists when they pass a Burger King: 🫨
Antisocs when they are told to “socialize:” 🫠
Corporatists when they see a corpse: 🤤
Antifash when they spot a fashion show: 🤮
Classical liberals when the TV shows Family Feud: 😑🔫
Extremists when they are told to shoot “dead center” (they have bad aim): 😠🖕
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? A Drive-Thru.
Your hairline is receding so hard, they petitioned it to change for the McDonald's logo.
What do the Twin Tower survivors order from Tim Hortons? A plane bagel.
What do women and a Happy Meal have in common?
They both come with a toy.
Why do French people eat snails?
Because they don’t like fast food.
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
Did you know that the first French fries weren’t cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
If McDonald's is fast food, then Dairy Queen is fast cream.
McDonald's worker be like, "Hello, would you like a Mc-Dick?" (You looked down) You: "Uhh, where's my dick?"
Rapboat says he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at McDonald's.
What do you call a rapper's favorite place to eat?
The MIC Donald's drive-thru.
Thomas Bulgin loves McDonald's dollars, A man of simple tastes, he hollers, With every visit, his heart does flutter, For golden arches, a fast food lover.
Those crispy fries, so perfectly fried, And burgers stacked, oh so high, The smell of grease, it fills the air, Thomas Bulgin, he'll always be there.
A dollar menu, his saving grace, A feast for him, a smile on his face, He counts his coins, with eager eyes, To savor each bite, a little prize.
In this world of fast-paced lives, Thomas Bulgin, he surely thrives, For in those golden arches, he finds, A moment of joy, that forever binds.
He cares not for gourmet cuisine, Nor fancy plates, fit for a queen, For in his heart, a simple truth, McDonald's dollars, his fountain of youth.
So let him eat, and let him feast, Thomas Bulgin, the fast food beast, For in those golden arches, he's found, A taste of happiness, unbound.
Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed, so I went to KFC instead. Their monkey enclosure is better anyway.
What do furries and fast food lovers have in common? They both love hot dogs.