Family

Family jokes

Mama

Yo mama's so fat, there's not enough yo mama's so fat jokes to tell how fat she is.

Ball

Why did your dad FUCKING LEAVE YOU? He went to suck balls.

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?

She gagged.

Memes

Orphan

Hey girl, are you an orphan?

Oh, that’s right, I’m your daddy.

Orphan

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

One gets picked.

Aunt

Gwen, we can chat in 2 months. My aunt just died from COVID, and it is taking forever for us to get there to California. I love you, your boyfriend, Prince!

Orphan

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple always gets picked. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Sis

Brendon, just shut up, no one was talking to you on the fucking joke! And my sis is not a female dog. If she was, then how the hell would she spell!

Orphan

Why can't orphans go to family restaurants?

Because they don't have a family to go with.

Wordplay

Did you know that "girlfriend" at the end, it starts with "end." So does "boyfriend," and "friend" have "end" at the end of it, but "family" at the end it "ily" I love you.

Orphan

What does the orphan have in common with Batman? They both lost their parents.

Blackjack

What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?

They both hit me face down on the table.

Sister

Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.

Sister: No, I won't stop.

Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.

Sister: What? You will see when I post it.

Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?

Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.