Family jokes
So my son came up to me and said, "Hey, Dad, I’m hungry." So I replied "Hi, Hungry, I’m Dad."
And then I feed him my dick.
There was once a young sister who never got anything good for her birthday, and she was sick of it. So one day the girl asked for a puppy, and the parents said yes.
When she got the puppy, he was nice, but the puppy needed food every two minutes. The parents eventually got sick of it and came up with a plan. Two weeks passed and the younger and less fat sister asked where her other sister was as she wanted to play Barbies. “And also, why haven’t you been feeding the dog? He needs food, you know.” The parents only answered with “Oh! Yes, you can have a room all to yourself now. And about the puppy...he won’t need feeding for years.”
What is it called when you whoop a donkey?
A whooped ass and apparently some people get that everyday from their drunk dads.
Hahahahahahhah my nan died :)
There are two sexes: one with your mother and the other with you.
What does an imouto ride?
Onii-san.
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.
Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."
Woman: "What's the bad news?"
Dr: "Your baby is Ginger!"
Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"
Dr: "It's dead!"
What do you call your angry French aunt?
A crossaunt.
Knock knock. Who's there? Not your dad.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
I learned my dad got into a car crash this morning.
And my driver's license got revoked too.
Technoblade says, "Punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?"
For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.
I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.
What's an orphan's favorite game?
GTA, because they're actually wanted? Lol.
My mom told me to clean the sink, but I couldn’t find you.
Your dad is Spider-Man because he’s far from home.
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
When you see your mom.
Me: bruh
Her: Are you serious right now bro?
Me: Yeah no shit.
Her: *slaps me*
Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.