Family jokes

Why do orphans go on holiday?

To see what family is like.

My mum told me to do the dog poo, but I couldn't find you anywhere.

What did the kid say to the orphan?

"Well, at least I have parents!"

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.

When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.

My grandfather is a great fisherman, especially at baiting a rod.

I guess you could call him the Master Baiter.

Why in Alabama people don't use doggy style... Cuz you don't turn your back to your family.

Kid: I got homework.

Mom: Ok, so?

Kid: I got a F in my balls.

What's the difference between orphans and apples? Apples get picked.

Go up to an orphan and say: "Yer ma is deed."

Why can't orphans play games?

Parents signed.

Why is Dawayne so small? Because his parents cut him up into small slices!

I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."

When your mom says it will all be ok if you just......... *there is blood on the floor*

When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)

So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."

Mom, start eating, or else you will get fatter!

What are the similarities of an orphan and a water fountain?

They both sprout water.

Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."

Orphan: Starts crying.

Why can't orphans use iPhones?

Because they can't press the home button.