What's the difference between my girlfriend and my uncle?
My girlfriend didn't go to jail for loving me.
Family Jokes
School teacher: "Hey kid, why don't you just go home to your family?"
Orphan: "My family never came back for me."
School teacher: "Your daddy must've really needed that milk."
My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.
Why do orphans want to become criminals? To know what it feels like to be wanted.
What cookies did the orphans never try?
Home made cookies!
What is an orphan's dad's job?
A magician because he makes himself disappear.
Why can't an orphan go on a field trip? They don't have a parent's signature.
Pick up lines.
"One fish, two fish, three fish, I’m breaking up with you, b*tch!"
"Hey there little mister, I’m dating your sister."
You know why orphans can't play baseball? 'Cause they can't find home.
How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.
What's a penguin's favorite relative?
Aunt Arctic.
Why did the orphan become a killer?
Because he knew they would not look for him.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
I hate when my brother dates other people.
Just kidding! 😵😵😵😵
My relatives always teased me during weddings, saying, "You'll be next!"
But they stopped when I did the same to them during funerals.
I like telling dad jokes.
He laughs at most of them.
I have so many orphan jokes. I'm afraid most of them won't hit home.
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
Q. What type of flour do orphans get?
A. Self-raising flour.
