Family jokes

Why did the orphan fall out of the tree?

They thought their parents would catch them.

TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?

My cousin: the other half.

Why do orphans prefer iPhones under the iPhone X? Because they have a home button.

Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."

What is the difference between apples and orphans?

The apples get picked.

What do you call an orphan family photo?

A selfie.

Why can't orphans go to the hospital? Because it is a family hospital. Sorry for the long break in between my jokes. I just had some family stuff, but I am back.

Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.

My mom asked me if I was okay, so I replied, "I will be," and jumped out the window!

Yo mama so fat that Will Smith could slap her from a mile away.

Why do orphans cry at insurance places?

They got offered the family plan.

What's the difference between an apple and a child?

The apple gets picked.

A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂

Your hairline goes back to when your dad left you.

Your mom is so fat when you printed the picture, it would not stop printing! 😂🤣

I tried to adopt an orphan. The card got declined harder than the child did.

What punishment are teachers unable to do to orphans?

Call their parents.

I recently became the coach of an orphanage baseball team.

Because I hate dealing with parents.

Yo mama is so ugly that your dad has to be drunk to bring her home.