Exercise jokes
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
Why I can’t be skinny? I hurt myself for fatting. - Jenny
Hello please I want gain wait. - Jenny year later.
What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?
Flexin’.
They struggled to lift the weights, but I got watermelon to keep me in shape.
Guess Stephen Hawking never had use for sweatcoin😂
On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.
I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!
I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
Why did the out of shape cow quit her job?
She got tired of jumping over the moon.
When I'm cutting my grass, want to know what it reminds me of? My arms and legs.
That moment when the disabled kid has to take the Pacer test.
"Russian" twists into a ditch, dead!
What do squats eat? Numbers.
What's the definition of suspicious?...
A nun doing sit-ups in a cucumber field. 💀
I keep getting ads about belly fat.
What time do dogs 🐕 get a walk done ✅?
Time to walk with your dog 🐶!
Touch your toes and hold them. Then spell "run." It will say, "r.u.n."
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch some chips and sweets.
No, he can't keep his heart rate down, and she's got diabetes.
Why didn't the teddy bear go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Which is the best sport at making fat people lose weight?
Canned hunting.