Every jokes

There's a plane crash. Every single person died.

Who lived? The married people!

If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.

You're so ugly that every time you look up in the sky, God says, "Sorry, can't help you."

What does every arsehole and Tory have in common?

They all produce horrible shit.

Hey guys, starting tomorrow, I will put one letter of the "doin your mom" song every day. Can I finish the song?

Also, I might be in Fortnite, hehehehehe.

The thing about animals is every time you pick one up, you have to put it down.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, In your presence, my love, Every moment feels new.

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Every time my cousin and I, we settle it out with our game, so we play rock paper scissors. 😂🤣🤣

What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.

What’s the difference between Swifties and rap fans?

One rap fan has a higher IQ than every Swiftie combined.

I'm so bored and miserable, that I have sex with my inflatable girlfriend every night.

The best part? She don't talk back.

You ever try sexting with AI? Every time I type “I’m coming,” it replies, “Coming where? Need directions?”

Why is it that every time I masturbate, things get out of hand?

Confucius say: Never try win head-butting contest with mongoloid. You lose every time, and you only hurt yourself.

Unless he use Mongolian recurved bow... then you in trouble!

Water bottles, strong, Standing tall, like sturdy men, Quenching every thirst.

Clear and transparent, Reflecting strength and resolve, Resilient and pure.

In hand, they offer Refreshing relief, like hugs, Soothing every soul.

Water bottles, like men, Nourish and hydrate our lives, Simple yet vital.

jacethehater, you are a hater, and it needs to stop! Waterhsharky is very nice to people, so leave him alone for whatever he/she did or did not do. He did not do nothing. So leave him/her alone. Plus, making threats to people is very bad, and comments can be seen everywhere! So don't get too cocky with everything.

One day I caught my sister talking to my girlfriend, and she said, "You never told me you're lesbian." I said, "No, not at all." My girlfriend asked, "Why did you not tell her?" and I said, "Because every time I bring a girl home, I hear too much noise in her room, and I never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash." She said, "Yeah, the trash is her junk."

Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."

Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."

May our days be abundant, a dance of delight, May I navigate life with courage, taking flight. May our journey be a beauty, a blessing so sweet, May I celebrate friendships, where hearts and souls meet.

May our nights be bright, with laughter and cheer, May we live with love, eliminating every fear. May I grow in kindness, a serenade of grace, May our lives be a marvel, a splendid embrace.