As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
Dying mall be like...
"Toys" were us.
Goodbye, kitty.
Dying Canes.
I have to say my humor isn't the best, but I'll give this a go.
My science teacher always reminded us about kilometers per second. Now I want to kilometer per second.
You know those credit card inserters at Walgreens? I want to insert my credit card on my wrist.
I'll shut up now.
What egg do you buy an orphan?
Free range.
Hey any riding with Biden fans out there?
I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so if one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that'd be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 and a half, help me please.
How can a gay man that is unemployed be productive in the workplace?
Give a blowjob to other gay men in the workplace for money.
Why do orphans get the small sized chip bags?
Because they don’t have a family to share it with. 😥
Why don’t Chinese kids get to celebrate Christmas?
'Cause they're the ones making the toys.
The American Dream is real. It's just set and filmed in Toronto and not Texas.
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
Minimalism is a scam created by Big Small to sell more less.
Your hairline is like the economy it's going down
Why can't homeless people buy a house?
'Cause they live on the streets.
Kid: How much do you get paid?
Teacher: Minimum wage.
Q: You know what's morbid at a storage sale?
A: They give you more bids.
ASDA.
Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt?
Now he's a bronze fish.
In the year 2020, who were the biggest enemies?
Coronavirus and toilet paper.
Walmart (DYM 73).
My dad owns a countertop store and sometimes he'll barter.
A lot of the time he will take things for granite.
A lot of counter-offers were made.
