Earth jokes
๐: You're so hot!
๐: How are you single?
โ๏ธ: I burn anyone who gets too close!
God, aka Mr. Universe said he was God's gift to this earth, but where is he?
I told my girlfriend that the world is flat.
She said, "but the world is round."
I said, babe, you are my world.
What can a rock possibly say?
Answer: I'll fuck ya mum rock hard.
Yo mama is so big, her belt size is "equator."
What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.
They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
Yo mama's so big, her belt size is "equator."
Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.
What if plants are farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, and turn into natural fertilizer which helps them?
What language do they speak in the middle of the earth?
CORE-ean
Why is the world split in half? Because fat people are weighing the Earth down.
The Earth was flat until yo mama buried herself.
Stephen Hawking will be greatly missed for the time he walked this Earth.
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
In the realm of whispers and shadows, Where dreams dance on the edge of reality, There resides a peculiar soul, Known as Alexander Fisher.
With eyes that hold secrets untold, And a heart that beats to its own rhythm, He tiptoes through the night, On a quest to embrace the extraordinary.
His hands, delicate as a feather's touch, Reach out to the heavens above, Grasping at ethereal strands of wonder, In the form of vibrant, floating balloons.
With each step, the balloons whisper, Carrying tales of forgotten dreams, And the untamed yearnings of the heart, Alexander Fisher's silent companions.
He creeps through moonlit streets, An enigma in a world seeking answers, As the balloons trail behind him, Painting the night with magic's hues.
Together, they wander through the darkness, Where imagination blooms and thrives, In a delicate ballet of dreams, Alexander Fisher's fantastical symphony.
The world watches, captivated, By this balladeer of whimsical desires, As he weaves his spell, one balloon at a time, Enchanting souls with his ethereal art.
For in his delicate grasp, balloons become more, They transcend their earthly existence, Becoming vessels of hope and joy, Guiding hearts towards the realm of possibility.
Alexander Fisher, the dreamer, the poet, Creeps through life, a gentle force, With his balloons as his faithful companions, He reminds us to embrace the extraordinary.
"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."
Vegans: Save the Earth.
Normal People: We're trying to, but you guys keep eating it!
Do people live on the Earth ๐? Yes, a lot of people live on the Earth ๐.
Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.
Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.
Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.