Question: What's the smallest thing on earth?
Answer: Your brain.
Earth is smaller than Uranus, wth?
Your hairline is so close to Earth, it's 100 million lightyears away!
Your hairline is so far back that it made every country on earth disappear.
Average bee is 50x smarter than the smartest flat earther.
"Joe Mama so fat she plays pool table the Earth."
Yo mama so fat.
She is the reason why people think that the Earth is flat.
What happens to the crow in the earthquake?
It turned into a milkshake. 🤔😂
Why is the world split in half? Because fat people are weighing the Earth down.
Your mama's so fat, when she grew an inch, she pushed the Earth down.
The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.
Aha, tomato macaroni is bad, hahaha.
(I don't even know what on earth I put here, but okay.)
"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."
You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.
What is the biggest butt in the world?
The bottom of the ocean.
Girls with the name Carley have the biggest forehead on the earth, I mean, moon.
There are two kids sitting in a classroom: Lily and John. Lily sleeps in class every day.
The teacher asks Lily who made heaven and earth. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"
The teacher says, "That's right."
The teacher says the next day she asks the same question. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"
"That's right," the teacher says.
The next day she asks Lily what did Eve say to Adam after their 100th. John pokes her again. "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'mma break it in half!" she shouts.
Stephen Hawking will be greatly missed for the time he walked this Earth.
What is the difference between Jesus and the devil?
When the devil came to Earth, he was the one with the nail gun.
Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.
Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.
Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.
