My wife said she wanted to leave me she said it’s because of the abuse but really she’s the one abusing herself by drinking alcohol and got positioning the next day this shows almost half of the woman’s population is weak both physical and mentally
you know why hitler wouldn’t drink whisky? because it made him angry.
I woke up when I heard a strange noise coming from my kitchen. I turned on the light and I saw none other than the exposed flop GHOSTNALDO. He asked me if I had PenalTEA, his favorite drink. I said no and yelled ,,there is big game tomorrow", and he disappeared.
You know that i drink water right? I drink water bc of i am water water is water
Why do vampires drink blood? because they can't drink bloodly Marys because they are vampires
Ddi you hear about the new drink commemorating Princess Diana? It had nine shots and seven chasers!
What’s the only reason Emos drink
To get hungover
Amber Heard Daily Routine Get out of bed, Drink coffee, Take a shit on Jonny depps bed.
Why are midgets constantly thirsty?
They can't reach the drinking fountains.
my wife and i went to the bar to get a drink but 2 mins later i see her dead on the ground i guess she couldent see the bottle flying at her face then i laughed and went home.
-All over it like a fat kid on a cupcake. -Giggling like a room full of fat kids. -Drinking 8 cups if water a day seems impossible but 8 beers and 3 shots in 3 hours goes down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
A man who drinks a lot is told by his that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him. Later the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no.' He says to his friend' if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Dont worry' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no' the man says producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'Whats the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'
man drinks beer jumps off a tower and he's okay the other guy says Whoa how'd you do that.he does it again so the guy gets a beer the same beer and jumps off he died.the bartender looks at the original man who jumped off and says Superman you're a real butthole whenever you're drunk
A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a drink and a mop “Huh, I wonder why he needs a mop?”
one day me and my friend Howard the duck went into the bar,I ordered a drink,Howard told the waiter to put it on his.. BILL
Teacher, there is 3 birds 1 gets shot how many are left.
Student, non they flew off because the shot scared them off.
Teacher, acautly 2 but i like the way you think.
5 minutes later
Student, there is 3 women eating ice cream 1 licking it 1 drinking it melted and 1 sucking it which one is married.
Teacher,the one sucking it?
Student, no the one with the ring but i like the way you think.
Why can’t orphans drink nothing because they don’t have any money
