More expresso less depresso Jk lets all drink bleach cuz life is a bitch
I was at the bar late last night when a waitress screamed anyone know cpr? I said shit I know all the letters of the alphabet. Everyone laughed well except for this 1 guy
(Titanic walks into a bar) (britannic) what would you like to drink (Titanic) a ICEBERG.
What do a girl and a bar have in common?
A- Liquor in the front poker in the back!!
What does an electric-type Pokémon say when they get gassy while drinking milk? I’m Zaptos intolerant!
Man: *steals drink Boy: bro😭😭 Man:why are u crying over a drink? Boy:that had dugs Man:....
How much alcohol does JFK prefer to drink?
3 shots.
What is a frog's favourite drink? Croaka-cola!
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had I said “yes”
“Poor old fool,” thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink. The gentleman asked, “So how many have you caught today?
”The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”
What is an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? tea-hee-hee
Man: hey kids, who wants milk? Kids: Me! Man: *unzips fly*
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A guy went to the doctor and told him that whenever he drinks a cup of tea his eye hurts ,the doctor brought him a cup and asked him to drink ... when he finished the doctor told him : from now on take off the spoon.
Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee. SO his mom said he can have one. He got an esspresso not knowing depresso came with it.
Why don't orphan drink milk
Cause there parents have not came back with it yet
Steven hawking walks into a bar.... no I'm just kidding.
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says: If i can suprise you, i get a free drink. The bartender was unsure but agreed. The guy pulled up a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket and he starts to play The bartender was suprised and gave the guy a free drink The guy then sais: You see, i have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes, can i get another free drink if you get a free wish? The bartender agrees without hesitation The bartender wishes for a 1000 bucks, but he gets a 1000 ducks WTF! the man shouts. The guy answered: Did you think i wanted a 30cm long pianist
