Downing jokes
A good dog name is Syndrome. That way when it tries attacking, you can yell, "Down, Syndrome!"
You're so ugly, when you went to the makeup store, it shut down.
Chuck Norris heard that nothing in the world could kill him.
So he tracked down nothing in the world and killed it.
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
Me: DOCTOR! DOCTOR! I HAVE 50 SECONDS TO LIVE!
Doctor: Sit down for a minute.
What's black and white and read all over?
A newspaper.
What's black, white, black, white, red, white, black, red, black, then red all over?
A penguin falling down the stairs.
What happens to Mary Poppins when the wind dies down?
*Mary Poppins seen falling in background*
My best opinion: when life goes to hell, you just go down with it.
Q: Get up for a chair joke!
A: Oh, never mind, you can sit down.
If you're ever down one day, just go to the orphanage and bully an orphan because what is he going to do about it? He has no parents.
TRUE STORY!
X-Ray Tech: I broke my arm and went to the hospital. The X-Ray Tech was the hottest blonde I've ever seen.
I threw her ass down on the X-Ray table, ripped her clothes off, ripped off mine and I jumped on top of her!
Then I put the X-ray machine on top of us, turned it on and I looked up on the X-ray monitor and I watched and saw my sperm swimming up inside her!
Bigfoot is just a normal person who covered himself in Pritt Stick and went down on Susan Boyle.
Why don't you see black people with Down syndrome?
Because God doesn't punish someone twice.
Her husband prepares them a romantic dinner. The wife tells her husband about her desire for it. The husband was clueless about such acts. So, the wife tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay underneath her naked in the reverse missionary position.
She starts thrusting with his meat inside of her and starts waiting for him to thrust along with her thrusts. However, the husband didn’t know what to do, so he just laid there. Suddenly the wife had an urge to pee, but held it in because her husband’s joystick was right inside her. She loses control after a while and lets one drip out. The wife apologizes profusely and continues thrusting her husband. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another drip of urine run down the husband’s schlong to his pelvis.
The husband throws the wife from the couch, gets up, and says,
"Honey, if you think I’ll be screwed by you for more of that, you’re out of your mind."
How do Chinese people name their babies?
They chuck a pan down the stairs.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, each with a buck and a quarter. Jill came down with $2.50, that fuckin' whore.
What do you call a Russian rifle that went 1 rank down?
An AK-46.
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
So a cupcake walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says to himself, "Damn, this is some good shit."
When Michael Jackson died, people melted him down into Lego pieces so that little kids could play with him instead.