Downing jokes

Joke: Why did the gym close down?

– It just didn’t work out.

Susie was in her mother's room one night, as her mother was getting ready for bed. She had slipped off her blouse; her boobs, plum and perky. Susie had asked what are those and will I get them? Her mother had said they were boobs and she would grow some in a few years. Her mother told Susie to find her father and say goodnight.

So Susie left, headed down the hall to the bathroom where her father was showering. Susie knocked on the door, he said come in. He had moved the shower curtain over just a bit. Susie said she loved him, and then seen her father's dick. Shocked, Susie asked her father what that was and if she would get one. Her father said it was a dick, and he said Susie would get it after her mother went to bed.

"Pull down your pants, pull out my willy, stir your guts round like a hot bowl of chili."

What do you call a stoned kid with Down syndrome?

A baked potato.

What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Tell her to slow down and use lubricant.

I was walking down the hallway at my job when I saw a kid crying.

I asked him where his parents were, and he kept crying.

Man, I love working at the orphanage.

What falls down the building and doesn't get up again?

An emo.

Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."

The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."

What does a race track and your hairline have in common? They both go up and down.

Chuck Norris heard that nothing in the world could kill him.

So he tracked down nothing in the world and killed it.

Don't treat her like a gold pump when she's treating you like a gray pistol. Put down a launch pad and rotate.

Q: How do you fit 4 gay men on a bar stool?

A: Flip the chair upside down.

Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!

Officer: You OK, kid?

Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.

Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*

When officer leaves:

Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?

Roses are red,

Potatoes are brown,

Your mom's so hot,

I put her down.

You know I used to call my dogs' balls the Twin Towers, until they came rumbling down.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.

What is the difference between 9/11 and rickrolling?

The Twin Towers gave up and let down.

A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"

She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"

He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Why can't emos stand in chairs?

Because they never get down.

They call me an elevator because I let people down.