Dont jokes
Why do kids with cancer hate their birthday? They don't know if they'll be alive to see it.
Why do orphans miss half their basketball season? Cause they don't have home games.
Why are there no Africans on cruise ships from Africa to America?
Once again, they don't fall for the trick!
Stop telling orphan jokes before they tell their parents.
Oh wait, they don't have any, please continue.
Gay orphans don't exist cuz they have no one to call "daddy," and lesbian orphans don't exist cuz they have no one to call "mommy."
I don't like consistency. Last night, I spent three hours looking at a room and thinking, "I need a flower pot here, and the couch should be on the right." Eventually, the police arrived and led me away from my neighbor's window.
An orphan can never get a call home from school because they don’t have a home to call.
I walked up to 2 people kissing and stared.
After a little while, they asked me if I minded. I said no, I don’t mind.
Don't be emo, be happy, Nemo!
Why can orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
I remember my uncle's last words:
"I don't think we're going shooting today."
What do girls have that boys don’t have? Bobbies.
I don't joke about vegans. That would be tasteless...
I have no beef with them.
Sister: I don't want to do it, but...
Me: No more butts! Butts are too yuck to be in this sentence.
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!
So you know how sheets are always so tight at hotels?
Well I looked under the bed and there is a freaking room cleaner holding the sheets. All he says is "Don't ask or you shall die!"
Why did the blind man cross the road?
Don't ask me, he can't even see where he's going.
Sleep and death are alike; it's just with death you don't wake up.
A pair of Newfoundlanders, watching TV, saw endless big-budget advertisements for mass-produced American beer.
One Newfie turns to the other and says, "They say that stuff is the biggest seller in the States, but I don't see what the big deal is." So they buy a bottle, pour it into a plain jar and decide to get an expert opinion.
They send a sample to a lab in St. John's to have it analyzed.
A day later, the lab results come back: "Your horse has diabetes."
Arab rizz. Are you a tower? Because I wanna blow you up and don't let your friend know about this. Rashid, I told you not to blow it up, I had it.
The greatest Arab pilot, my grandfather.