Dont jokes
What did a tree say to the tomato?
Nothing! Trees don't talk, silly.
Why do girls rub their eyes after they wake up in the morning? because they don't have balls to scratch.
Just because you‘re suicidal, you don‘t have to be a quitter.
Wait, actually.
Why do orphans miss Mother’s Day? Because they don’t have a mother to give to!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
Lesson in laziness number 136894236842: don't be too lazy to read large numbers.
Don't pick flat chests because they will turn their backs on you twice.
Q: What's the difference between a prison and a concentration camp?
A: At least you don't die when you shower.
Why don't pirates take a shower before they walk the plank?
They just wash up on shore.
I don't understand why people hate it when they hear a dad joke. They are actually pretty funny, and I will show you Y. (shows a picture of the letter Y)
Why don't orphans have any friends?
Because they don't have homies.
OMG, you wanna hear a joke?
Nah, I don't care.
Why do orphans like tigers? I don't know, you tell me.
Fat bully. That was just the starter, now do you want the main course?
Me: I don't think I want that because you already ate it.
When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."
What is the similarity between Hitler and orphans?
They both don't have parents.
If you can’t touch your brain or see your brain, you don’t have a brain?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why don't emo girls date emo boys? Cause they've already got a pussy.