DOE jokes
What type of camp does a kid with ADHD go to?
Concentration camp.
What does a slave owner use to buy slaves? A Master Card.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.
What does NASA say when they don’t want to go in space: Never Access Space Again.
Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.
Sans: I am doing something.
Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?
Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.
Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.
Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand?
A: She moans with the other.
What does a dog do in a dresser?
It pants!
What does the Bible stand for?
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but how they got in there's the real mystery!
How can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles?
Answer: Just throw one candle in the sea; the boat will become lighter.
One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks, “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said, “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks, “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says, “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad, “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says, “Your mother, of course,” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says, “You’re so so sexy!”
Why does an orphan go to church? So they can call someone father and be loved.
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
9: one to screw the lightbulb, one to film it, one to post about it on a women empowerment social media page, one to complain that the man didn’t screw the lightbulb, one to say that women deserve to screw more lightbulbs, one to try to get #womenlightbulbscrewers trending on Twitter, one to bring a man and show him the screwing, one to say that women are better than men at screwing lightbulbs, and one to make a speech about the lightbulb.
Why does the United States have such a good military? Because they learn to dodge bullets in school.
How does NASA organise a party?
They ‘PLANET’.
Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂😭
What does an orphan call a family picture?
A selfie.
How does Daveon like his coffee? Decaf-eon.
How many poets does it take to change a light bulb?
One to curse the darkness, one to light a candle.
How many times does Ariana Grande knock at the door?
She doesn’t, she just uses 7 rings.