DOE jokes
Where does the banana learn to split? At Sunday school.
If lint comes from pockets, where does a cockroach come from?
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they are all crying in a dark corner.
What does a plug do when he's horny?
He jacks off!
Memes
What kind of air does Ariana breathe?
Helium?
How many white women does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. To hire the Mexicans.
What do the Nicaraguan Contras, Crips, and Crack have in common? The CIA.
What does a disabled disco play?
"When your legs don’t work like they used to before."
What does the "f" in "orphan" stand for? It stands for family.
What does the cow say when it's going on holiday? - MOOOOOYORK.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends how hard you can throw.
Why does an orphan like home base? Because he doesn't have one.
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They're both meat substitutes.
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds?
Kermit in a car crash.
Why can’t an orphan use an iPhone?
Because the home button does not work.
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?
She is the only one that calls me "lamo."
What does a gorilla attorney study?
The law of the jungle.
How does the skeleton call his friends? With a tele-bone.