What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common? They never get old.
DOE Jokes
How many Africans does it take to change a light?
A water bottle.
What's the difference between your mom and your dad? One leaves your life to go get milk, and the other cleans up after you, feeds you, and does your laundry.
What does Kobe and the Twin Towers have in common?
The pilots just couldn't stick the landing.
Wow, that was explosive!
Man, I'm on fire π₯ today!
A guy on a bus saw a beautiful girl. He asked for her number, and of course, she said no. He asked the bus driver for advice, and he said, "That girl goes to the cemetery to pray every day at 10 p.m. and look for a statue of an angel." So he dresses up as God, goes to the grave, and she sees him. She says, "Oh, Lord, end my misery! Kill me now!" And he said, "Only if you do something for me first." She replied, "What is it, oh mighty Lord?" He said, "Have sex with me." She agreed. They had sex, and when she was done sucking his dick, he said, "I have something to tell you." He took off his costume and said, "I'm the guy from the bus." And she took off her costume: "I'm the bus driver."
(Does anyone remember this? It's an old joke someone made, or does no one remember this? I didn't make this, but it went smth like this)
Comedian: If youβre racist and you know it, clap your hands.
Guy 1 & Guy 2: ππ
Comedian: WTF bros!
Comedian: And one of you is black and one is white. How does that work?
Why does Jesus never vacation on Earth?
Because he traveled down about 2,000 years ago, got with some Jewish chick, and they're still talking about it!
What does 9 and 36 add up to?
A life in prison.
What does LMAO mean?
Launching missiles at orphanage.
How does a prostitute that has blond hair and polish and a gay white male kill erectile dysfunction for his clients?
He performs fellatio on them.
If Tim goes to heaven and Tom goes to hell, where does Tam go?
Up your ass.
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
Why does it take longer for women to orgasm than men?
Who cares?
Two cannibals were eating a clown when one looked at the other and asked, "Does this taste funny to you?"
How many babies does it take to make dinner?
Three to four; there's not a lot of meat on them.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Teacher: Ok class good morning, we are going to start off by what kind of sound animals make.
Teacher: Ok, what sound does a pig make?
Class: A cow says, "moo moo."
Teacher: Good.
Teacher: What does a sheep make?
Class: A sheep says, "baa baaa."
Teacher: Good! Now what does a pig say?
Little Johnny: A pig says, "Put your hands up and get against the wall you black mother fucke*!"
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? 327.
How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Well, there are 69 in my basement, and it's still dark.
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?
That it will never get old.
