DOE jokes
How does the cheetah do in every race?
It’s always a cheetah.
Two hotdogs are walking across the street. One is walking slow. What does the 2nd one say?
"Ketchup!"
What do Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker have in common?
They both died at 95.
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.
2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!
3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.
4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.
5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.
Memes
What do the Twin Towers and school have in common?
People jumped off a building to escape it.
An American walks into an Afghan bar. Joke, Afghanistan doesn't have bars because of the Taliban.
Why does an orphan want to be a prostitute?
Because they want to call someone "daddy."
What does an iPhone have that orphans do not?
Home buttons.
Why does the emo hate Christmas?
The ornaments get hanged, and they don't.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
What does a bungee jumper and a homosexual have in common?
When the rubber snaps, they both end up in the shit! 💩
What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
Kids turn them on.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
What do Monica and Bill Clinton have in common? They both did not inhale. Lol.
On which side does the chicken have the most feathers?
On the outer side. 😂😂
What does a Tusken Raider eat after his meal?
Some desert!
How many communists does it take to change a lightbulb? Never enough.
When a deaf girl master baits, does she use the other hand to moan?
Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.
Sans: I am doing something.
Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?
Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.
Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.
Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.