DOE jokes
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
Why does a girl orphan want a boyfriend?
To finally call someone Daddy!
What does a hear-moo say? "Fat cow!"
What does a cow say? Moo.
I walked up to a group of moms having a conversation while waiting to pick up their kids from day care. They were using cutesy words like "ankle biters", "rug rats," and other terms I've heard parents use before when describing their toddlers.
I thought I'd chime in; as it turns out, "carpet muncher" doesn't mean what I thought it does.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Joy.
Why does the cannibal village not exist anymore?
They all ate each other.
How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
10; 1 to do it and 9 to back him up.
What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? Snap-on tools.
What does an orphan say after a kid makes a "yo mama" joke?
"I don’t have a mama."
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
Why does this category seem to have the most retold and recycled jokes on this website?
If a gay person is vegan, how does he have sex? He will keep getting meat stuck in his ass and in his throat.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw it.
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
How many emos does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just sit there and cry in the dark.
What does the 'w' in Africa stand for? Water.
How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb in the middle of the night?
I don't know, I can never see them.
Why does an orphan start with an "O"?
Because they only see their parents in their dream.