How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three, because it’s the normal person's height.
What does McDonald's and priests have in common?
They put their meat inside 10 year olds.
A Russian, a Brit, and a terrorist are in an air balloon.
First, the Russian says, "I dare to throw a stone down!" So he does that, but the others don't seem to be impressed. So the Brit says, "I dare to throw a brick down!" So again he does that, the Russian is impressed, but the terrorist laughs and says, "I dare to throw a bomb down!" So he does that and everybody can't believe what they have just seen. So a bit further, they land, and a shocked and afraid little boy comes running up to them. So they ask what happened, on which the little boy said, "I farted and my school exploded."
Why does a leaf fall faster than an Emo?
The Emo hangs himself.
What does an apple and an orphan have in common?
One gets picked.
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
I asked God why nobody likes me. He showed a reflection of myself.
What does my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
Why does USA suck at Clash Royale? They already lost two towers.
Why does Sans say "I got a bone to pick with you?"
Because he needs to pick your balls.