Disabled jokes
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
I bet a disabled kid on a wheelchair that if he could catch me, I'd give him 1000 dollars. He said deal, and I went upstairs.
What shampoo does Stephen Hawkings use?
Head & Shoulders.
I went to a park, then I kicked a ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then screamed "Rocket League!"
What is a gay person’s favourite meal?
Willy con carne.
How can you tell when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.
What is black and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
I am disabled and I find these jokes appropriately hilarious.
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:
Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"
Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"
Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? -- You make a seizure salad.
You know what’s impossible?
Steven Walking.
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics. They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair. But I knew she'd come crawling back to me.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
Kid: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Kid: But, mom, I'm blind!
Mom: Exactly.
I just found out I'm colorblind. It came out of the yellow.
What has 50 legs but can't walk?
25 disabled children.
Why can't disabled people make jokes?
Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy, isn't it?
Give a blind kid a gun and tell him it's a hair dryer.