Disabled jokes
That's a knee slapper, or should I say, a wheel slapper?
What do you call a seven who's not feeling well? A sick seven
Where did Sally go after stepping onto the minefield? Everywhere
Getting a girlfriend is just like parking a car; usually all the good ones are taken, so you just gotta stick it in the disabled one and hope nobody notices.
What do you call a disabled person that has no legs and likes being alone?
Leaving, walking.
The man had no arms and a little girl came over and said, "Give me a high-five."
He said, "I’ve got no arms," and the girl said, "Are you an eel? Cause he don’t have arms."
Is a disabled person who has no arms but has guns armed or not armed?
My brother was stuck in a wheelchair after a motorbike accident. He became a swimming champion until I took the VR headset off.
What do you call a disabled gang member? A crip.
Q. What do you get when you cross a mentally disabled person with a pedophile? A. Jeffy Epstein.
What is a disabled man called?
"Woman." Haha.
Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg?
He's all right.
Man, this walk is really good. Oh wait, you can't.
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
Are people too thick to realize the difference between a fruit, a vegetable, and a person?
What did the blind kid say after receiving a cheese grater for Christmas?
"This is the most violent book I’ve ever read."
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
Times are hard at the moment for people on disability benefits. I’ve got a friend who’s a dwarf...
...and he’s struggling to put food on the table.
I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.
Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
Why do disabled people make good golfers?
Because they're always handicapped.