Disabled jokes
Where do people with no legs go to have fun?
Legnoland.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he's hooked up to? The computer runs.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies?
The Windows shutdown sound plays.
What do you call a fat Chinese man?
A double chinkey.
Don't let an extra chromosome get you down.
I went up to the blind kid and punched him and said bet you didn't see that coming
My friend and I were walking down the street, and we saw this one disabled kid getting bullied by three other kids. Urgently, we sprinted over to help. He had no chance against the five of us.
What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?
Nothing.
What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs?
A paintball.
Why can't disabled people make jokes?
Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy, isn't it?
I used to get pushed and called lazy in school.
Man, I loved that wheelchair.
Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he.
Q: How do Chinese people name their kids?
A: They throw pots and pans down the stairs and see what noises they make.
What is black and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
How did Stephen Hawking die? He lost Wi-Fi connection.
What’s a depressed kid’s favorite game? Hangman.
I went to a park, then I kicked a ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then screamed "Rocket League!"
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:
Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"
Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"
Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.