Disability jokes
Q: What do you call a baby in a vegetative state?
A: A tater tot.
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
The bands Def Leppard and Blind Melon did a collaboration.
They called the song “Helen Keller.”
How did people bully Helen Keller? They said, "Wow, that was the coolest thing ever! You really should have seen it!"
How do you punish a blind person?
Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.
She responds: “See that man over there with no arms? Tell him to clap.”
The kid replies: “But, Mom, I’m blind!”
Mom: “Exactly.”
Did you hear about the TikTok post that offended disabled people? Some didn't reply because the comment section was disabled.
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I wanted my first time to be special.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite childhood song?
The wheels on the chair go round and round.
Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."
When Helen Keller tries singing the national anthem at the Super Bowl,
Aaaaaaaaaa Aaaaaaaaaa Aaaaaaaaaa.
How do you ground a person in a wheelchair?
Take off the wheels!
Where can a gay male that is abled bodied find the location of a glory hole if he is looking for a free and anonymous blowjob from another gay male?
From a physically disabled gay male who is either at the gym 💪 💪 🏋️♂️ or at the rest area ♿️ 🚹 🚽.
Why did the retard cross the road?
He never made it!
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair?
TIMMAHHHH!
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
What can’t a person with no arms do: if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
Imagine if a disabled person's last name was Runner or Walker! 😬😂
I stole a wheelchair. I knew the owner would come crawling back.