Disability jokes
Why was Stephen Hawking always bullied?
Because he couldn’t stand up for himself.
How do you break up blind people in a fight? Scream, "I put my money on the guy with the knife!"
I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.
Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.
Dyslexic man walks into a bra.
You're so lucky bullies don't have a chance to push you around anymore?
They'll get theirs when they're in a wheelchair?
A woman walks into a supermarket and sees a blind man swinging a dog around in the air. So, the woman walks up to him and asks, "What are you doing?" The man says, "Just having a look around."
What is better to have, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
What's the worst part of a Down Syndrome relationship? There's more downs than ups!
Damn, this computer stopped working. It's got autism.
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.
What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?
They both have special needs.
What do you call someone in a wheelchair during a California fire?
A steamed vegetable.
My friend was on a wheelchair... he committed suicide yesterday. I remember when I met him last time, he told us a good joke and I appreciated him and told him to become a stand-up comedian.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To help Stephen Hawking cross!
Why are quadriplegics so unsympathetic? Because they only have feeling in 10% of their body.
I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.
Stephen Hawking died because he rolled too far from the outlet.
How does a blind person know when a skydive has finished?
The dog lead went slack.
I have no legs.