Disability jokes
Imagine Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady but could not stand up.
Why were Helen Keller's hands crippled?
From reading stop signs at fifty miles per hour.
I'm really worried for Stephen Hawking, 'cause how is he going to climb the stairway to Heaven?
You'd think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no... oh no, he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.
Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?
Mother: He died.
Daughter: How did he die?
Mother: He never got recharged.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite snack? His shoulder.
Why couldn't the chicken cross the road?
Because it was disabled.
Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?
A: Wave at him.
What do you call a blowjob from a girl who has autism?
Special head.
Aren't paraplegics just plegics that can fly?
What was the one test that Steven Hawking couldn't pass?
reCAPTCHA
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?
You have to look down to see him.
Why doesn't Helen Keller's kid have ears? She gave it its first haircut!
There is a young man smoking and a woman in a wheelchair. The woman says, "Why is a young man like you smoking?" The man turns around and says, "Why the fuck are you wearing trainers?"
Why don't you see black people with Down syndrome?
Because God doesn't punish someone twice.
A cannibal went to the dietitian, and he got told to eat more vegetables, so he ate a disabled person.
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hair dryer.