Difference jokes
I tore up my homework, but then I replaced it with this copy. It may look like it, but trust me, it's different! The answers ARE RIGHT, better than left!
What is the difference between the government and organized crime?
Only one of them is organized.
What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.
What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your boots off before jumping on a trampoline.
What is the difference between Drake and Carrie Underwood?
Carrie Underwood kissed a 12-year-old boy on the lips.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a school shooter?
A school shooter actually makes an impact on its targets.
What is the difference between a lesbian and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?
In the U.K., it's a swear word.
In America, it's a family reunion.
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
What is the difference between Catholics and Lutherans?
Catholics are registered sex offenders.
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and SpongeBob's Sandy Cheeks?
One is living in a bubble, the other one in rubble.
What’s the difference between a gay rooster and a straight rooster?
A straight rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-do!"
A gay rooster says, "Any cock will do!"
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile? Nothing.
What is the difference between Sir Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?
I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.