Difference jokes
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
What is the difference between a lesbian and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What is the difference between Catholics and Lutherans?
Catholics are registered sex offenders.
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?
In the U.K., it's a swear word.
In America, it's a family reunion.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a cutting board?
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.
What's the difference between an ugly monster and you?
Nothing.
What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?
Pizza won't cut itself.
What's the difference between an orphan and a vegetable?
The vegetable gets picked.
What is worse than a baby getting hanged in a tree?
That same baby getting hanged in multiple trees.
I tore up my homework, but then I replaced it with this copy. It may look like it, but trust me, it's different! The answers ARE RIGHT, better than left!
What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile? Nothing.
What is the difference between Sir Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?
I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.