Difference jokes

What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)

What’s the difference between a violin and a viola?

The viola burns longer.

You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...

Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...

What’s the difference between a dog and parents?

If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.

What's the difference between Putin and Hitler? I don’t know, you tell me.

How do you tell the difference between a girl spaghetti and a boy spaghetti?

Meatballs.

What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?

I personally think cereal is not nutritious.

What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved.

What's the difference between Pink Floyd and George Floyd?

When Pink Floyd can't breathe, it's because all their fans are smoking pot.

What is the difference between runners and my car?

My car is still running.

Q. What's the difference between a CEO and a deer?

A. You don't normally fuck the deer after you've shot it.

What is the difference between an orphan and a candle?

One is used.

My arm has a different texture than the rest of me, lol.

What is the difference between a flower and an orphan?

A flower gets picked.

What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?

A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.

What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?

I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.

The only difference between you and Jesus is that Jesus believed in himself.

What is the difference between a guy with cancer and the Twin Towers?

Nothing, they both fell.

What’s the difference between a job and a wife?

The job keeps sucking after 5 years.