Difference jokes

What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?

You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?

My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.

What's the difference between your mom and a laundromat washer?

The washer doesn't take loads for free.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked. Orphans don't.

What’s the difference between a female farmer and Hitler’s girlfriend?

One bails her hay, and the other heils her bae.

What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?

In the U.K., it's a swear word.

In America, it's a family reunion.

What's the difference between YouTube adverts and orphans?

Most get skipped no matter how interesting they are.

What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?

One of them is an outside job.

What is the difference between an orphan and a TV?

One has more channels.

👱‍♀️ 👱‍♂️What is the difference between two blondes and a Libertarian?

A Libertarian hasn't won a presidential election since 1972, and two blondes are too stupid to run in a presidential election.

What's the difference between a Palestinian and SpongeBob's Sandy Cheeks?

One is living in a bubble, the other one in rubble.

What's the difference between yo mama and a fat ugly pig? - I never fucked that fat ugly pig...

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?

Harry made it out of the chamber.

What's the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire?

One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.

Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.

What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?

I can't jump off a burrito.

What’s the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and a priest?

They both like lil' boys.