Difference jokes

Hey, what is the difference between a painting and a wife?

Only the wife was hung up.

Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂

What body part do pigs have that humans don’t have?

A hambone.

A mirror and a terrorist are the same... Only... a mirror doesn't need a gun to kill.

What's the difference between depression and your ex?

Depression fucks you harder.

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and my uncle? Nothing, they both steal children.

What's the difference between homework and a hooker? They both start with an "H", but we all know which one we would like to do.

How is abortion different from rape? Babies never consent to it.

What's the difference between a Porsche and 50 dead babies?

..... I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

What's the difference between oxygen and children? I don't have oxygen in my basement.

What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.

What's the difference between a snow woman and snow man?

Snowballs.

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and an erection? I don't have a Lamborghini.

What's the difference between a bear with a gun and an American man with a gun?

The bear has common sense not to fire it.

What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.

What's the difference between a boring teacher and a boring book?

You can shut the book up.

What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?

You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?

My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.