Difference jokes
What is the difference between Sir Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?
I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.
What body part do pigs have that humans don’t have?
A hambone.
Hey, what is the difference between a painting and a wife?
Only the wife was hung up.
Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂
How is abortion different from rape? Babies never consent to it.
A mirror and a terrorist are the same... Only... a mirror doesn't need a gun to kill.
Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in a different box.
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and my uncle? Nothing, they both steal children.
What's the difference between homework and a hooker? They both start with an "H", but we all know which one we would like to do.
What's the difference between a Porsche and 50 dead babies?
..... I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
What's the difference between oxygen and children? I don't have oxygen in my basement.
What's the difference between a boring teacher and a boring book?
You can shut the book up.
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.
What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
What's the difference between a snow woman and snow man?
Snowballs.
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and an erection? I don't have a Lamborghini.
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.