What's the difference between taking a shit and the Ottawa police force?
Usually taking a shit only requires one ass wipe!
What's the difference between my car and a school bus? A school bus takes them back home.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?
You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
What's the difference between a gun and a penis?
The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.
What's the difference between the Christ and Anti-Christ? The Romans put sugar syrup on the second one.
What's the difference between 5% of priests and 5% of atheists?
5% of atheists have seen a ghost.
5% of priests have spooked altar boys in the sacristy.
Why are dogs different than orphans?
Because dogs don't cry for there parents.
What is the difference between Clash Royale and the Twin Towers?
Clash Royale still has a tower.
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?
Nothing, they're both receding.
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
What's the difference between my arm and legs? Nothing I slit both of them
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
What’s the difference between the twin towers and Macdonalds macdonalds has a drive through twin towers has a fly through
what is the difference between an orphan and a watermelon one of them is picked
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla? One of them is fat and hairy, while the other one has a functional brain (the gorilla, of course).
What is the difference between me and the Twin Towers?
My mom was only airplane feeding me a spoon.
What is the difference between an Apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
