Difference jokes
What's the difference between a Thanksgiving turkey and my kid?
I only stuff the turkey.
What's the difference between Jesus and a dead, naked baby?
I don't worship Jesus.
What time is it when you get mad 😡 at school? Time to calm down.
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest?
You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid until he’s 13 years old.
What's the difference between broccoli and a booger?
Kids won't eat broccoli.
What is the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani primary school?
I don't know... I just fly the drone.
When did “yo” mean Hello?
They are so different, how did they come to mean the same thing? Did someone just walk up and accidentally say “llo” instead of hello and people were just like “what did you say?” and the man being embarrassed just made up a story and say “oh, I said yo, which means hello in my original language."
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.
What is the difference between a human and a house? A human can walk, and a house cannot walk.
What is your snow ❄️ name? X-ray.
What is the difference between a human and a bird?
A bird can fly and a human cannot fly.
So what is the difference between a real doctor and a doctor of philosophy?
One cures the sick and the other makes them sick!
What is the difference between a house and a car? A car can drive and a house can not drive.
Every time someone calls you a little different, car? Just say, "No, I'm not."
I love jokes!
What's the difference between a club and a bar?
I can only get dead hookers from the club alleyways.
What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying, "ten babies in one trashcan." Morbid humor would be saying, "one baby in ten trashcans."