Difference

Difference jokes

What’s the difference between a woman that doesn’t belong in the kitchen and Bigfoot?

Bigfoot is real.

What is the difference between the snow ❄️ and sun 🌞? Snow is slippery, and the other kind 🧒 of weather is not slippery.

What's the difference between my imaginary friend and God?

None.

They're both imaginary.

What’s the difference between me and a bakery shop? The bakery shop has cake! 😞🎂

What’s the difference between hungry and horny?

Where you put the cucumber 🥒

What is the difference between a tree and a school?

A school is for kids, and a tree is for birds.

What’s the difference between a mediocre thief and professional thief?

The mediocre thief will say “give me all your money!”

And a professional thief will say “sign here please.”

What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?

I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.

What has tree roots and what do I have for kids? What is the difference between a human and a used tire?

Tree roots are under the tree, and used tires are under the Hummer.

What's the difference between a human and a tree?

A human can chop down a tree.

A tree can't chop down a human.

What's the difference between a fly and a bird?

A bird can fly, but a fly cannot bird.

What's the difference between a Thanksgiving turkey and my kid?

I only stuff the turkey.

What's the difference between Jesus and a dead, naked baby?

I don't worship Jesus.

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  • What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?

    A belly button.

    What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest?

    You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid until he’s 13 years old.