Didnt jokes
Time flies by, doesn’t it?
But the plane in 9/11 didn’t.
My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?
Did you hear about the TikTok post that offended disabled people? Some didn't reply because the comment section was disabled.
Yo mama so lazy that she didn’t give birth to you until you were 15.
I didn't know I raped her. I thought she wanted me to hurry up.
I apologize if those jokes didn't meet your expectations. Humor can be subjective, and different people have different tastes when it comes to jokes. I'll try my best to share a few more jokes with you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one hat say to the other hat? You stay here, I'll go on ahead!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they'd be called bagels!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
I hope these bring a bit more amusement. Let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with!
I saw a dad shave his daughter's head because she made fun of a woman with cancer.
Good thing she didn’t make fun of a pregnant woman 🤭
Maybe the reason there isn't any physical evidence is because it didn't happen.
Guess whose parents didn't survive?
Liv's parents.
Me: I been up all night, no sleep--
The lie detector I didn’t know I had: Lie.
Me: stfu! I’m just singing!
Lie detector: You literally listen to music all the time... you almost don’t even sleep!
Me: THEN WHY THE FUCK DID TOU SAY IT’S A LIE, WHEN I SAID I DIDN’T SLEEP?!
Lie detector: It’s 3:00 AM in 8 minutes, you usually close your eyes to sleep when it’s 5:00 AM... You get waken up at 7:00 AM... you only sleep two hours......
I asked a kid why he was so blue.
Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.
Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.
(Just a joke, she's probably kind.)
It’s ok to yell “Kobe” after missing a shot, he didn’t make it either.
Why was the North Tower a bad doctor when the South Tower collapsed?
Because the North Tower didn’t do CPR.
A woman having labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
“Don’t worry,” said Doc to the worried husband.
“Those are just contractions.”
Two teenagers were raping an 11-year-old girl in an alley, so I stepped in to help. The little bitch didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
What's the difference between an Afghan kindergarten and a military target?
The drone guy didn't know either.
Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
Why couldn't the orphan get an Android? Because it didn't have a home button.
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"