Depression jokes
I don’t struggle with depression, at this point I’ve got it down. I’m good at depression.
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
What does a knife have but not my life...
A point.
Jokes are like your grandparents, old and dead.
Joke.
Kid #1: You're adopted.
Kid #2: At least they wanted me.
Kid #1: Did your real parents want you?
I be ready to commit suicide.
But when it comes to jumping out my window, I'm scared ash.
Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.
Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.
"Go big or go home," that’s what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that’s what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that’s what I say.
What do you say to a depressed person?
"I like ya cut, G."
Two friends fighting.
Friend 3: "Cut it out, you two!"
Friend 4: "It wouldn't help if they cut it out... Believe me... I've tried..."
Just buy emo grass, then you will never have to mow your lawn again.
Ethan Fennel
I was at a funeral and made a joke. No one laughed, but someone died.
The cure for depression is around the corner... There it is, the train.