Depression jokes

A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.

That one depressed friend.

Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.

Me: Wanna hear a joke?

Person: Sure.

Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.

Person: Dear God...

I don’t struggle with depression, at this point I’ve got it down. I’m good at depression.

The belt broke.

When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"

One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."

What does a knife have but not my life...

A point.

My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.

What did the talking rope say to the man?

"Just hang in there."

Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.

Jokes are like your grandparents, old and dead.

Joke.

I be ready to commit suicide.

But when it comes to jumping out my window, I'm scared ash.

Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.

Kid #1: You're adopted.

Kid #2: At least they wanted me.

Kid #1: Did your real parents want you?

Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.

"Go big or go home," that’s what some people say.

"Go loud and proud," that’s what other people say.

"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that’s what I say.

What do you say to a depressed person?

"I like ya cut, G."