Dead jokes
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Your dead son.
Karma is like rape.
What goes around comes around, like a dead rape victim in a whirlpool.
Paralyzed Man: *gets up* I’m out of here!
Blind Man: Did that paralyzed man just get up?
Deaf Man: Did that Blind Man see that paralyzed man get up?
Mute Man: Did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Dead Man: Did that mute man just say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
“Normal” Man: Did that dead man hear the mute man say did that deaf man hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Doctor: *calls 911*
911 service: 911 what’s your emergency?
Doctor: Yes, uh, a “normal” person just said that did that dead man just hear a mute man say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see a paralyzed man get up?
911 service: *hangs up*
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
What’s the difference between bossatron5678 and a gay man?
One isn’t retarded, and one isn’t gay; the gay man is dead.
WHO AGREES?
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
Obi-Wan be like:
"To Darth Maul, lightsabers are blue, lightsabers are red. I cut you in half, why the fuck aren’t you dead?"
I can't sleep, that's because you're dead.
I fed a vegan cock. No, not chicken, no, not my cock, my dead dad's.
One day a cow ate a fish.
What came out the other side?
A dead fish.
He dead, he alive, but most importantly, he got a new hard drive.
Roses are red, My cat try to kill your next >:)
How do you know the baby's dead? The dog plays with it more.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
What do you get when you kill a brown chicken and brown cow?
Dead chicken and dead cow.
Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?
Dark Jokes R Like Puppies:
Once they come out they are trash, but once it starts to get older, that’s when it’s noticed, but when it gets too old, you either proclaim it dead or never talk about it.
(I would never do that though I love puppies)
Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.
What's the difference between your job and a dead hooker?
Your job still sucks.
What do you call a dead parrot?
Polygon.