Daughter Jokes

The daughter milked her dad. It turns out it wasn't milk...

Helicopter, Helicopter Kobe Bryant in my chopper Sitting next to burning daughter Lots of smoke and little laughter

After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!

Yesterday I bought my daughter a cat , but accidentally hit her with the car today. I have no idea what to do with the cat now.

I saw a dad shaved his daughters head because she made fun of a woman with cancer. Good thing she didn’t make fun of a pregnant women🤭

Jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, jack got high grabbed her thigh, and said "you know you wanna" jill said yes and pulled up her dress and then they had some fun, but silly jill forgot her pill and now they have a daughter

haha i fucked you over

1st daughter: Dad I;m lesbian! Dad: oh OK! 2nd daughter: I'm also lesbian Dad: WTF does any 1 in this family love d!cks?!? Son: I do...

Jack and Jill went up the hill to go and swim in some shit jack forgot to bring some goggles and floaty and now they have a daughter

Secret Jill didn’t go in the shit yet jack went in first and died :D

What did the father name his daughter with no legs?

Peggy.

Little Susie had gotten her first period. She told her mom and they bought pads. The next month, Susie's mom asked if she had her second one. Suzie said no and her mom fainted

Me:Mom can I have some make up. Mom: no. You are beautiful just the way you. Me:So that’s why you were make up.

jack and rose went on a cruise to do it in the water. jack seldom wore a condom, and now they have a daughter.

I love you Hebrew john

you

jack and jill went down to hell to fetch ur mothers bladder her bladder broke u two are soaked and now u have a daughter cuz in that bladder was me

A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.

"Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.

"Denise."

"That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"

"Tom Junior."

How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!

My friends daughter is taking a job in California parking cars. She says she wants to be a valet girl. For sure. For sure.

My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness. Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!"