My girlfriend accused me of cheating, and I said to her, "You're starting to sound like my wife."
Dating Jokes
What excuse can you use if you find out your date is a rape victim and you don't want the baggage?
Say you've parked your car in a bad spot and are just going to move it, then move your car all the way back to your home address.
Boy: Hey! I love you...
Girl: Eww, you are so ugly.
*boy sent a pic of his dic*
Girl: Beauty doesn't matter in love.
Blossom: Why are we dating the Rowdyruffs when we're technically siblings?
Bubbles:...
Buttercup: I don't know, but those people over there are lookin' at us weird.
Alabama: 😈
A boy in nursery asked a girl out. She ran away crying in fear, so he just went back to teaching.
Today I asked my phone, Siri, why am I still single?
And I activated the front camera! 😭😭😭😭😭
Are you a ghost train? Because I am going to scream when I ride you.
What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom?
A. Condoms have evolved. They’re not so thick and insensitive anymore.
I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.
"I work with animals," the man said to his date.
His date said, "I love a man who works with animals. What job is it for the animal?"
"I am a butcher," said the man.
Chat date for Tenya and Jordan.
Hey, can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives you two nights in a row.
One twin tower had a girlfriend. The other twin tower had the same girlfriend, so they both went down.
Girls are like blackjack.
I always want 21 but end up hitting on 14.
Dating 101:
Here's what you do:
1. Dinner. 2. Kiss. 3. Movie. 4. Sex. 5. Bring her back home. 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting.
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!
I went on a dating site looking for arsonists.
I found a lot of matches.
You know why I only date disabled people? Cause they can't get away.
My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my other girlfriend.
I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.
