Dark Humor
What part of a vegetable can’t you eat?
The wheelchair. 😑
This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.
I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.
The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.
If you were a fruit, you would be a fineapple.
If you were a vegetable, I would visit you in the hospital.
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
There are people who are beautiful, and then there are people whom I won't rape.
How do emos propose?
"Would you like to join my family tree?"
Emo kids counting be like: 1, 2, 3 come hang with me! 4, 5, 6 Gonna get new slits! 7, 8, 9 Suicide! 10, 11, 12 Bring some pills!
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"
What is an emo girl's favorite map in Halo?
Hang 'em high.
I went to the principal's office because I gave a deaf kid ear pods for his birthday.
I was gonna tell a self harm joke, but realized it would cause too much pain.
What's the best thing about a dead hooker? Refunds.
What's the difference between a bird and a kid on the roof?
The bird can fly off the roof.
I went to the mental hospital. I asked one of the kid what its favorite animal was. They said a bird. I asked for a reason. It's because they both jump off roofs.
I’ll never forget my Grandfather’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.
You’re not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.
22. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
24. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
31. My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.