9 months before I was born ,
I went to a party with my dad and left with my mom.
What is an orphans favorite toy. A mom a dad action figure
me: "you wanna see my dad" some kid: "yeah?" me: "close your eyes and he will appear" some kid: "he ain't appearing" me: "sorry i thought he would appear for you. he won't appear for me" *the kid laughs"
moral: not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on 🙃
kid: dad, whats an orphan? dad:
Dad: your`e adopted Son: where are my real parents? Dad: >:D they are ded now come to the`re grave and sleep there
I don't know why my boyfriends dad don't like me maybe because we had SEX
best part about being an orphan?
not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling what's 2*3!!! And you crying idk!!!
I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave
Dad: What's the difference between an ELEPHANT and a POSTBOX?
Son: I don't know.
Dad: I'd better not trust you with my post then 😂
A boy asked his dad for a some money to buy an ice-cream with. So he went to an icecream van. Whilst he was in the queue 2 boys asked him what flavour he was getting he told them strawberry. The two boys were shocked and beat him up. The icecream man felt bad and gave him his strawberry ice-cream for free. When he got home his dad also asked what flavour he bought the boy said strawberry. His dad then kicked him out of the house. The boy confused walked down the street and was stopped buy the police who were looking for a boy who had been eating strawberry ice-cream. The boy said thats me and the policeman arrested him. A week later in court the boy was on trial. The judge asked, ''can you tell me what were you doing on the fith of may''(the day he was arrested) the boy said I was eatimg ice-cream. Yhe judge decided he was innocent. On the way out the judge asked him what the flavour was (he had forgotten to ask during the trial). Of course he answered with strawberry the judge horrified realised he had given the wrong verdict and the boy should have been executed. Unfortunately he couldn't change what had happened so the boy walked out and crossed the road but was hit by a car and died. The moral of the story is look left and right before crossing the road
Son, you are not precious so pack your bags because someone else is going to adopt you
Dad, what do you mean someone else will adopt me
Son, your adopted
How do you know that your sister is on her periods? Your dads dick tastes wierd.
I've never been to Bradford before until today. While driving through the city center with my dad I asked, "Would you set up a business here?" to which he responded "No". So I asked "Why not, you'd make us rich!", He gave me a confused face and asked, "How so?".
So I said, "Because sales would be fucking booming"
I know, it's an awful joke.
Why do people always talk about nine eleven??? my dad died that day he was a good pilot.
what's the difference between your dad and the mail man. nothing
The difference between Your Dad and Cancer? Cancer came back....
My dad is like my depression, you need a suicide letter to find him.
911 jokes are just plane wrong, my dad was a great pilot you know.
This joke probably flew over people's heads, but for some people it flew into their head.
Hi I did not text back to text her and dad now I’m texting her now I’m
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? cuz there dad never came back with the milk
