My sister's boyfriend is mad at me because I fucked his girl.
In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, "Girl, are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb."
Why cant asian parents have a white child? Cuz 2 wongs dont make a white
Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"
Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
What's worse than depression & suicide?
Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.
Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?
Why did the chicken cross the road? cuz he saw a chic 😉
Pickup line; Hey mama, you school? Cuz I'd like to shoot some kids up in you.
At the restaurant, the waitress starts flirting with me. "She must have COVID," my wife said. "Why?" I asked. "'Cause she clearly has no taste." She responded.
There's three kids: Little Drop, Little Feather, and Little Brick. Little Feather goes, "Mommy, why do you call me L'feather?" She answers, "Cuz a little feather fell over your head when you were born." L'Drop asks his mom, "Mommy, why do you call me L'drop?" She answers, "Cuz a little drop fell on your head when you were born." L'brick goes, "aafddkcasgbklcdahjkcbgtnhrfn."
I want to date depression cuz at least I know they won't leave me.
Me: I look up to you.
Friend: Wow, thanks!
Me: But in general cuz your so tall.
Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.
Why was the Tower of Pisa always leaning?
Cuz it wanted better accuracy than the Twin Towers.
Teacher: Why did the skeleton know the weather outside?
Student: 'Cause he could feel it in his bones.
Teacher: No, he read the weather report, you fucking idiot.
Your mom is so fat that she can't get internet because she is worldwide.
I went to the principal's office because I gave a deaf kid ear pods for his birthday.
Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC.
Orphans are funny cuz all they do is sing "We Are Family."
Why is the leaning tower of pizza leaning? 'Cuz it had better reflexes than the twin towers.
Are you corona? Cuz it’s hard to breathe around you ;)
